Jessica Simpson and Nick Lachey AD NAUSEAM
I think if I read one more thing or see one more headline on a magazine while I'm waiting in line at the store or I hear one more little update on the current minutely status of Jessica Simpson and Nick Lachey I will be sick on the spot. As in, throw up. Really.
Does ANYONE really care where they are, whether they are wearing their wedding rings, whether they have separated or gotten back together or are heading to divorce court? Does ANYONE really care that they partied separately, that they were seen with someone different, that they spent the weekend in two separate cities, that they spent the weekend together?
"Perhaps they wanted to take a stand against the latest claims that their marriage was over. Or maybe they simply craved some time alone, away from home and the constant media attention (like from the magazine where I get this excerpt). Maybe they just wanted a good Yorkshire pudding---whatever." Whatever is right. WHO CARES???? It's enough to make me break out in a frenzy of foul language and I don't believe in the spewing of foul language.
Hard on their heels is Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes (TomKat, they call themselves. Isn't that so cute? So heartwarming? So clever?). Again, WHO CARES. So far it hasn't been quite as minute-to-minute, but it's getting there. Are these couples really of such consequence that whether they put their left foot first or their right, or they take the pickles out of their hamburgers, or they're ticklish only on their feet---it's newsworthy? Will it have any effect on the planet or mankind in any way, shape or form whether their relationship is bludgeoned to death by an angry mob or whether it survives? I hate to be heartless but honestly, this borders on the absolute ridiculous.
Glad to have gotten that off my chest. Whew.
2 Comments:
Actually for the sake of correctness, I don't believe Tom and Kate called themselves TomKat. (I mean, come on, they're so above that kind of hype) I think actually, that they were dubbed this by certain media organizations. In fact, not that I would know, but you can often go to People.com and help pick nicknames(!). For example, we were recently able to help decide between Vinnifer and Vaughniston for Jennifer Aniston and Vince Vaughn. Just another exciting way to be involved in their lives (!!!).
11:22 AM, October 25, 2005
Neither Vinnifer nor Vaughniston works for me. Were you able to decide on one? I firmly believe that from now on, relationships should first be based on whether the combined names make a clever nickname. If they don't, it's a sure sign the relationship will fail. Except that "Bennifer" was clever enough but the relationship didn't last. I can't believe that a Hollywood marraige failed. What can I trust in anymore?
3:09 PM, October 25, 2005
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