Have It Your Way

Some time ago a group of us were having a conversation about how women are always worried about every little detail of their bodies and all the imperfections in them while their significant others just love them the way they are. (For the most part; this is speaking in general terms.) A woman won't be "in the mood" because she's feeling yucky about her body, those extra five or ten or however-many pounds, the firmness that disappeared---whatever. And the guy isn't noticing any of that; he just wants to feel close to his "honey". The woman, in her insecurity, thinks, "I could be just any warm body. He doesn't really care that it's me" and the guy thinks "What is she caring about all of that stuff that I don't care about?? We can't do anything, no hanky-panky, because of stuff that doesn't even matter to me??" Oh, the injustice of it all!

So one member of this group made this analogy (paraphrasing here): "It's like I have this hamburger and it's a little flat maybe and the bun isn't perfectly round and the special sauce isn't spread totally evenly. The meat isn't completely perfect and the lettuce isn't as crisp as it could be maybe. But it's MY hamburger and I'm totally looking forward to it. It's MY hamburger and it's THE. ONE. I. PICKED." And so now he wants to enjoy it. He doesn't want to be deprived of his hamburger because of all the little flaws in it. (Kind of drives home the "being a piece of meat" phrase, if you know what I mean.)

Does any of this ring a bell?? Have you had this conversation? Have you been the hamburger that was too worried or the impatient consumer?

The other day this conversation came to my memory when I saw this magnet. Naturally I had to get it to send to the person who made the analogy:



(You know who you are....it'll be in the mail soon).

The Smell Of Happy

When I step outside my front door, I can smell the sweet scent of jasmine. It grows up over the door to my right (my husband's office door), and there have been seasons where I couldn't smell it at all. But this year it has decided to bestow us the privilege of its scent.

As soon as I smell it, I instantly think of summer and warmth and contentment. I'm transported to no place in particular but where those three ingredients are thick and present. I think I'll sit right there on the porch and not move for the next couple of months.

The Possible Price Of Doing Right

By now many people have heard the story---especially you fellow People readers---about Teri Hatcher's brave admission and honorable deed. I read it first in our newspapers here since the event it was linked to took place approximately ten minutes from where I live.

Several years ago, a young teenage girl took her own life, leaving a note implying that a neighbor man---a trusted family friend---would know why she felt that ending her life was the only answer to her situation, her pain. Revelations of molestation quickly followed but there was nothing really to prove it and soon the man was going to walk. Until Teri Hatcher (of Desperate Housewives fame) courageously stepped forward and contacted our local police. She revealed that when she was young, this same man---who had once been married to her aunt---had also molested her. Her statement, her willingness to be a witness, caused the man in question to plead guilty, and he's now behind bars where he belongs. Disgustingly, however, he "has shown a remarkable lack of remorse."

One thing that struck me about this story was the fact that Ms. Hatcher had to pause and consider how much damage such a step would do to her career. Would stories circulate that she'd stepped forward to boost her at-the-time flagging career? Would there be suspicion of an ulterior motive? I'm glad that despite those possibilities---the possible negative impact to her livelihood---she made the right decision. They say without her testimony they wouldn't have had enough to convict.

It's too bad that anyone has to consider whether doing the right thing will be a bad move. It's too bad that Hollywood is so shallow that it's a real possibility to be an outcast because you revealed something ugly from your past---something that you had no power or control over. Something that someone else did. Something that you conquered and rose above and became strong despite its happening.

Hopefully more people will have the courage to do what might be hard if it means saving a child, saving anyone. Hopefully we as a society can judge less harshly the stain of rape and molestation and similar abuses and remember that the victim is a victim. Hopefully coming forward to help can be a badge of honor and not a cause for dismissal.

What Is That Strange Yellow Ball In The Sky??

Sun again finally! It's not as though there haven't been days of sun during the past couple of weeks, but it's rained so much I was starting to wonder if I'd somehow, unconsciously and impossibly, moved to Seattle in my sleep one night.

It isn't exactly a crisp, clear day---it's a little fuzzy around the edges---but I'll take it. Especially since it's supposed to rain the rest of the week. Is this ever going to end? I don't live in Washington or Oregon for a reason. Despite the beauty of those places, it comes at too high a cost: I don't want to live underwater. Hopefully my town will remember it's a Californian and get back to the business of being sunny and warm and mild-weathered.

Reps To Failure...?

I know what the expression means: you do as many repetitions of a particular exercise until you can't possibly do one more. Rather than just say "12 reps"---which may not be sufficient, especially if the weight used isn't very sufficient---you instead do as many reps as you possibly can. If the weight is significant, this could mean only 6 reps, say. It seems to me, however, that maybe the expression should be something more uplifting or motivating----like, say: "reps to victory" or something like that.

At any rate, yesterday I did plie squats again which I haven't done for awhile. I did reps to victory and I'm experiencing failure today. I can barely move! Each step has me stifling back a scream. I'm sure it's an interesting show watching me cross the parking lot.

Santa Cruz circa 2006

It's hard to tell from this photo, but this lovely costume is being worn by a man. He's apparently the draw for the other man who is playing a violin. It's good to have something to catch the attention of passersby in case the music doesn't do it.

I love this town because anything goes and you never know what you'll see.

And then, of course, there's the ceaseless beauty of an ever-moving ocean.

Found!!

The lost has been found! My wedding ring is no longer playing the field and will soon be back on my finger.

Almost two weeks ago we spent the night at my parents' place (they live about an hour away). It was a three-day weekend and it was easier to stay there Sunday night than drive home late. We stayed in one of their guest rooms, had a good night's sleep, went about our business the next day and so on. Unbeknownst to me, however, my ring decided to stay. The mystery is how it ended up in the bed where we were sleeping and why I didn't notice I wasn't wearing it. I don't know how it could've fallen off; it isn't loose really. Did I take it off before I went to bed (which I sometimes do because my hands swell a little at night often)? Did I put it on the bedside table and then somehow accidentally sweep it into the bed while I was making it? Seems unlikely. Did I take it off but was so tired my arm didn't make it all the way to the nightstand and I fell asleep before I could get it there? Hmmm. Unlikely scenarios.

The great news is that it doesn't matter why it's there, only that it is and I'll be getting it back this Sunday. Woo-hoo! I'm married again.

Sealed With A....Cloth

The counters are pregnant and all seems well. No sign of morning sickness or bloating. We shall wait and see.

Thou Shalt Not Covet Thy Neighbor's Truck

unless it's really really cool and you really really want it.

Is that the way it works??

Actually, someone else was coveting it too because they came with a big white trailer thing, loaded it up and off they went, taking my yellow truck with them.

I can't drool over it anymore when I drive down this street. Sigh.